Dear Bioware....

Dear Bioware,


I think we need to break up.


I like you enough and all, but it's clear to me that you don't care enough about me as a woman and in general, as a person, to commit to greatness.


We had a good run of it in Dragon Age:Origins. I fell in love with your lovingly crafter characters and unique worlds. I loved the racist and bitchy elves and thier plight with the Werewolves, the slow moving world the dwarves inhabited. I enjoyed the mages turning into scary, grotesque creatures and I learnt to never, EVER touch the small glass vial. I adored you for the way you made Dragon Age:Origins a whole life and a whole world for you to live it in.


But most of all, I loved you for the people. The people who you talked with and annoyed, who you kissed and insulted and laughed with. I loved Alister and his geeky adoreableness, even if it was ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE at some points to bone him. I loved Shale's fear of birds. I loved Zevran. Morrigan was a huge bitch and Lil was an entertaining little flower. They were almost real people, and I remember when Alister and I finally got it on I nearly danced with joy. When he dumped me cause I was an elf I cursed like a sailor, and may have teared up a little.


And then I played the expansion and thought 'They aren't going to make the next game like this, are they?'. I clicked objects to interact with people and that was the only real way to learn about my new companions, companions that I eventaully didn't care about anymore because I knew almost nothing about them. They were no longer the interesting, loveable characters that I knew.


Then The Boyfriend started looking up details about DA2 and began to freak me out. Qunari have horns? Sten was just a genitic fluke? Then why did -EVERY OTHER- Qunari look like him? I took some deep breaths and tried to rationalize retconning an entire race.


Then I discovered that the dialoge system was turning into the MASS EFFECT VERSION.

This? This is -BAD-.

This is GOOD!

WHYYYY?!?! *Cries*

I was so upset, Bioware. I can understand wanting to appeal to a wider demographic, but you already got me playing DA, you didn't have to do this!

DA2 was such a huge letdown, Bioware. I spent 90% of the game in one place, which wasn't changed in any way. Not even a little re-dressing, just the same place with new fights. The charcters were interesting and fun but you barely got a chance to figure that out, because I could only talk to them when it was quest-related. The backstory I did discover made me want to know more, but I had no chances to just chat with them for no reason. Yes, the fighting was nice and much smoother but I don't play for the fighting! I play for how wonderful your people are and how much I love your wonderful places.

I am so sorry bioware, but the lack of naked man chest combined with a dry story and hateful character interaction made this game almost unplayable. :(

So we're done. Unless I see proof that DA3 is going to be better.

Sadly not yours any longer,

Tamara.

Tamily Fies.

Sometimes I sit and wonder what my life would be like if I didn't have the family I did.

If I was born to two people who valued self esteem, or two people who shared the responsabilty equally. Or if I had a sister instead of a brother. Usually, when I think of these things, I decide that while my current situation isn't ideal in any way, that I do like the parents I have. Sure, and the moment I'd like a paino to fall on my mother, but once I move out I think our relationship will be a lot better. Because if she starts yelling at me over the phone I can just hang up.

And my dad...I love my dad. He's a quiet guy usually and sometimes he acts like my mom, but when he is I usually do excatly as he asks. Why? Because dad never gets disperportinally angry about things. When dad yells or makes a rude comment he is actually and truely upset about something. So I do it. It seems like any occasion is a good occasion for mom to yell, so I rarely take her screaming seriously anymore and therefore, see no reason to do as she asks.

The one person who I truely think I would miss if I had a different family would be my brother. He's 16 which makes him a bit of a shithead, but he's smart about politics and when I come home late and he's the only one up we can talk till two in the morning about his friends, Canada's lack of young politicans, communism and why it could work and all sorts of differnet and varying topics. He's got some sort of learning disability that makes reading and writing a chore for him, but he'd do it if it's something that interested him. I fell like teachers should tailor things more for him, but then I don't know what kind of 'special' treatment my brother gets. I'd rather not know, honestly.

I love my little brother even if I give him a hard time somethines. I guess it's what big sisters do. I've straightened his hair before (It's a curly mess), made him walk up to the corner store to buy me candy and even kicked him in the face once when I was thirteen because he called me stupid. On the other hand, my parents remain unaware of him smoking dope, when I've known for a lonnng time. I've bought him booze with the strict stipulation that he doesn't tell mom and never, ever drives after. I've gotten rid of his annoying friend for him and even told people he was out with mom when he was in the basement playing COD.

And he's a good brother. He told The boyfriend that while he may be eight years his junior he would still kick ass if anything douchey was done. My parents are blissfully unaware that The Boyfriend and I enjoy carnal pleasures, while my brother has known for almost a year. (Poor kid, walking in...*Shudder*). He even covers for us sometimes. He's a good kid.

Maybe me and him could get a mother transplant?

Sometimes, things just don't work out.

I'm not going to school anymore. I don't want to go into details, because it makes me depressed and I feel horrible enough about it as it is, but what are you gonna do, huh?

The Boyfriend and I are still togeather and going strong. Almost two years now, pretty damn exciting. I'm really glad that I have him through all of these hard times I'm going through.

My mother has become particularly unbareable lately. If you're wondering why I've got so many spelling mistakes it's because she took my laptop. She said she would give it back to me once I cleaned my room, so I cleaned it. It's vaccumed and dusted and the laundry is done. But when I asked if I could have it back she said she'd 'think about it'. Which means I'm probably not getting it back until I pay my dad back for it. Really sucks too, because if I'm seen using dad's laptop (As I am at the moment), I'll get yelled at and lectured. No one's home at the moment so I'm safe.

Mom yells at me for no other reason then she can, it seems. For almost two years I've been coming home in between eleven at night and three in the morning from The Boyfriend's house, and no one has said anything about it. Last week my mother stayed up past two so she could 'catch' me. I would've tried harder to evade her had I known there was anthing to 'catch' me at.

Mom: Did you just get in?!
Me: Uh...Yeah?
Mom: Do you know what time it is?!
Me: Like, almost two?
Mom: So what, this is a regular thing for you?!?!
Me: .... Um...
Mom: You better get your act in gear young lady! And I don't want you -EVER- coming home at two in the morning again!!!
Me: ...I've been doing this for awhile...I don't understand why it's suddenly an issue..
Mom: BECAUSE BEFORE I WAS SLEEPING WHEN YOU CAME IN BECAUSE I HAD WORK IN THE MORNING.
Me: ....

I didn't talk to her for awhile and it seemed to die off. Lat night I came home at one and she didn't say anything. In fact, I haven't changed a damn thing but she's either asleep when I get home or she's forgotten about it. I'm guessing she forgot. She does that.

Then I asked to sit down and talk to her. I said I was sorry for the way I talk to her sometimes but that they way she treats me isn't in any way nice. She said she knew. I told her that I'd like it if she talked nicer to me and treated me with some respect. She said nothing. I told her that her usual meathod of yelling at me and insulting me ('Selfish bitch' Has become my new nickname.) rarely makes me want to do things for her, and she told me I was rude and embaressing.

Understand that. I asked her nicely to treat me a bit better, and she said I was rude and insulting. I broke down in tears to tell her that I hated myself enough, it would be nice to not hear every word out of her mouth be some sort of jab at my personal hygine or my lack of friends or whatever, and she said she knew but didn't at any point say she was sorry or promise to try and do better. So I've reverted to my old meathod of dealing with her. I'm going to avoid her as much as possible and hope she dies in some quick but fatal car accident.

I know what you're thinking. 'That's HORRIBLE. She has BREAST CANCER.' But it's true. I've met lots of people who think their parents are the best people ever, and that's fine. I don't. I remember the nice things my mother has done when I'm not around her. When I am around her, I remember the time she stuck a fork in my brother's hand because he tried to take a peice of her cake. He was seven. Or the time she screamed at me for four hours striaght on my sixteenth birthday because I 'lost' a pair of two-hundred dollar gold hoop earrings I had just gotten, when they were on her nightstand the entire time. Or the time she said I was shaped like a barrel. I have a list of things I could rattle off that would make you see my mother they way I do. But I don't see a point. Think of me as the horrible ungreatful daughter if you'd like, but just think of it this way. The positive things I tell The Boyfriend when I'm trying to defend my mother's actions to him have gotten so repetitive that he'll look at me and finish the story. That's how few of them there are.

Sad, isn't it?

I want to write a hiaku about my contempt for John Cena.

I'm not good at poetry, but I still want to.

See, late the other night, when The Boyfriend was fiddeling with something or other and I was flipping through the channels aimlessly, I happened upon the WWE.

I've never watched the WWE before, because I'v always kinda found it stupid. Everyone knows it's fake. It seems very.... Redneck to me. I thought that perhaps that was an unfair view of the WWE, and decided to sit and watch some, to tell myself I wasn't making judgements on people and that perhaps some sort of shining ray of entertainment would fly out of the TV and hit me smack in the face.

After watching an hour of the program, I discovered a few things.

1-John Cena is the God of WWE.
2-Most of the program is taken up by shirtless men in speedos yelling at one another and being booed by the audiance.
3-John Cena is a bit of a douchebag.
4-Some of the shirtless men get togeather in groups of four or five and yell at each other. Then they get booed louder. Because while I didn't think it was, that is possible.
5-Seriously, fuck John Cena.

I'm not kidding about that last one.



That's his finishing move.

Now I gotta say. WWE has some characters. Badly acted and horribly sterotyped characters, but characters none the less. But how did this dude become God of WWE? Better question, WHY?!

I don't understand. Maybe The boyfriend can explain it to me?

*Is Miserable*

I'm sick. It's the unpleasant truth. It's mostly in my throat and head but my stomach has been upset with the world for a few days too. I don't know if it's related to my throat problems or not but I'm willing to wager it is.

The only reason I'm choking down a couple of Advil and sucking on a hall is because I'm pretty sure today is the in-class writing assignment in my design writing class, and the professor said the only way you can miss it is if your doctor writes a note saying you weren't allowed to drag your IV into the class. Keeping that in mind, sick me is going to go in. I won't be happy about it, but I'll go.

Whenever I'm sick I always get that strange sensation that everyone and everything around me exist in a light fog. Like my mom, standing taking the nail polish off her fingernails. There's a strange quality of unreality to her movements.

I'm never sure if this is a high from medicine or my brain seeing things oddly while sick, but it's not a pleasant experience. It's like I'm the only normal one and everyone else is a little off. A little slower then they're supposed to be and a little blurry, like when i have one contact in and one out.

Of course I know it's me who is a little off. But it feels like it's the rest of the world and maybe that's okay when you're sick.

*Sleepy*

I'm really tired.

I got home and into bed at one in the morning and had problems falling asleep because it was one of those times when your like "Goddamn it brain, go to sleep!" And your brain goes "Haha, NO! *:D*" (Source).

Then I finally fell asleep, but woke up again at four twenty-one in the morning. I didn't understand why but my nose felt funny. Like it was running.

I pressed the palm of my hand against my nose, pulled it back and reveled a dark blemish on my hand. Great. A nosebleed at four in the morning. That is just epic.

So I got up and ran to the bathroom, hand on my nose and a bit of panic in my heart, and stopped the bleeding. However, it felt like it was still bleeding so I stood there for an hour making sure it wasn't. When I went back to bed it was almost five.

What a fantastic way to start my day.

ALERT! ALERT! SITUATION CRITICAL!

*Flails*

Eekkkkk.

Badbadbadbad VERY BAD.

So, Uh... Okay. I was online today, minding my own business and reading some blog posts, when I got an email from Facebook. I'm never really on Facebook, but I get lots of emails from people poking and prodding me and whatnot, so I fuigred what the hell, and clicked on it. I see this:

DO YOU KNOW WHO THAT IS?! DO YOU?!

Of course you don't, I haven't told you and I made the name all blurry.

IT'S THE BOYFRIEND'S GRANDMOTHER, YOU GUYS!

*Panic*

She is one of the nicest old ladies ever, right? Like, adorable and sweet and all that great crap, which is why I do not want her reading my Facebook! Because on the one hand, if I post something like... I dunno...

Me: Tamara-Wow gys i aM SoooOooo wated righ now!

I don't want it to tun into this.

Me: Tamara-Wow gys i aM SoooOooo wated righ now!
The Boyfriend's grandma: Bestgranever1: Interesting, what you choose to do on a Tuesday morning.*

I'm pretty sure I would not only die of shame, but I'd end up being dumped by The Boyfriend. And I don't want that to happen!

On the other hand, if I quietly ignore her as the site suggests she's going to KNOW. And then she'll be suspicious that I'm saying things that she wouldn't want to know and that's why I'm not adding her. This is exactly correct but I don't want her to know but ultimately, she'll know either way.... I'm rambling. It's because of the panic.

The way I see it there are two was this can go down.

1) I can add her and let her see exactly how horrible I am (God knows his mom already does, I was bullied into adding her), and hope that she either won't pay much attention or won't be able to see cause she left her glasses somewhere. This way, I risk her becoming overprotective and therefore, perhaps have tension with The Boyfriend's Family rise.
2) I can ignore her, wich will have one of two consequences.
2a) She will forget about it and move on.
2b) She'll start imagining the horrible things I might be doing that I don't want her to know about, picturing me torturing kittens, binge drinking and pushing her grandson down flights of stairs while telling him it's his fault. None of these things happen, but she is a grandma, it's their job to freak out over little stuff.

None of these options appeal to me. I don't know what to do, and the beautiful and all-knowing K is at some sort of shindig in which she will not answer my textually rendered pleas for help. The Boyfriend..Well he went to a wedding with the bio-dad, and was supposedly home an hour ago, but he's not answering texts either and it's worrysome for me. I'm hoping he just forgot his phone.

*Sigh* BAH.

*(NOTE: I don't do this. This is an exaggeration of what may occur. The last time I got drunk was my 19th birthday, and if you need to know how long ago that was I turn twenty on the second of November. That's right bitches.)

The interwebz

lot of the Internet is bull.

It’s a sad but true fact. Most of the time I skip over comment sections completely because I’d honestly rather not deal with assholes. I know enough of them in real life to want to volunteer myself as live entertainment. Why on earth would I want to spread my opinion if I know I’m going to get at least three people telling me I’m stupid and/or a fag? I wouldn’t! So why would I comment on anything?

I’ve only left one Internet comment on anything, and that was because of this stupid guy who kept saying he didn’t mean to offend anyone, but was doing a very good job of just that.

Another annoying thing about flame wars is when I agree with someone who is defending my position, but their spelling and grammar is cringe-worthy. I mean, most of my mistakes are typos, and I know I’m bad at spelling. But I run all my posts through spell check and grammar check before I post and every time I see a typo, it’s… ‘on’ instead of ‘one’ or something dumb that spell check might not catch. And I always fix it later.

But during a flame war, at least try to sound educated. I’m asking this to all you people out there (who are probably educated if you’re reading a blog to begin with), Please, PLEASE try to use proper spelling when defending a position. It really takes away from your agreement when you phrase it as “Lol dud3 I luv keesha shes soooooo funny and soooo talented and u can just fuk off!”

Even if the person you’re flaming is talking like that, it makes you look better to them if you’re spelling correctly. Also being polite helps, but really, it’s the Internet. How likely is that? Not very, if we’re honest. But trying is nice, isn’t it?

Xal returns.

So now I'm being informed that I have to be available on Fridays.

I have Fridays off because of school and my Show, Supernatural. I've had it booked off for the past two months, because I can't work on Fridays.

However Xal, who hasn't had a problem with this for the past two months, is now calling the union and making sure that I have to be available on Friday so he can try to fire me.

Apparently my schedule has to be 'You are available Friday, Saturday and Sunday as well as one day throughout the week'. Never mind that I'm available every other day besides Friday, and that it's been two months that I've had it booked off and it's only now that this has become a problem. He never booked me on Fridays before anyway, so I didn't think this would be an issue.

However now it has, and this is a huge problem. School and Show are more important to me then Xal and the fucking seafood department, but it's so hard to find a job right now that I don't know what to do. Do I sacrifice my grades and the one thing I go out of my way to do, or do I submit to Xal.

I've told Xal that Show is actually night school, to try and keep him from going this far, but apparently it doesn't matter. Now that I think about it, telling him that wouldn't have helped because he's a douche and wants me to lose my job, so I don't know why I even bothered with the lie. I could have told him it was for my AA meetings and he still would've been a little bitch about it.

Anyway, I think I'm going to start looking for a new job. My biggest problem with it is I need to transfer my resume over to my laptop from the old home computer, which barely works anymore and is downright stupid. It takes ages to do anything on it and never seems to do exactly what you want it to. I'm really not looking forwards to using it.

The Great and Terrible Xal.

I'm not making money right now.

The main cause of my lack of finacial gain in Xal. Xal is my boss. I work at a grocery store in the seafood department, and Xal is my manager (NOTE: Xal is not his real name. I re-named him to better express his villainous nature. It's close though.). I hate Xal.

When I first began to work in seafood, I though Xal was the greatest boss ever. It was my second job, and before I had worked in a fish and chips place called Fisherman's.

Fisherman's was run by Nick and Christine, an older Greek couple who had two settings. Loud and angry, and actually loud and angry because they weren't angry with you to begin with, just Greek. They inspired me to start writing when I began a book about the whole thing, but I was only getting four hours a week, and as a waitress I was under paid and paid under the table. So I decided to try getting a different job. I went in for an interview that foreshadowed some of the problems I would later have with Xal, but at the time I was stupid and thought foreshadowing only happened in well thought out books.

The first part of the interview was with a very nice HR lady who chatted about things with me and told me that Xal, in all his glory, had asked her to 'screen' me as an employee and if she liked me, to call him. She seemed to like me well enough because about three minutes into our interview she said she was going to find Xal.

Finding him took about half an hour. They paged him six times, called the department, even sent someone on their lunch to go see if he was in the back room of the store. The pages were loud and annoying and I was slowly and surely becoming more and more embarrassed, because he didn't seem to be around and the pages were really loud.

The HR lady (who I haven't seen since, I think Xal ate her), came back after a few minutes and sat across from me in this little room that joined onto the break room. She sighed and said she couldn't find him, then tilted her head to the side as she stared past me and narrowed her lips a bit.

Me: Well, I could always come back...
HR: No, that won't be necessary.
Me: *Slightly panicked* No, I mean it's not problem, I can come back any time.
HR: No, I mean he's right there.

She stood up and left, and I was confused. Until she led in a late-thirties guy with a buzz cut and "Employee since 1990" printed on his name badge. He'd been sitting in the break room the entire time, eating pizza.

(I just want to something that sink in. I was born in 1990. Yeah.)

He ushered the lady out of the room, making a comment on how good she looked (She was probably in her 70's), and sat down in the chair she had previously occupied. He then proceed to introduce himself, take another bite of his pizza, and stare at my resume for a good five minutes.

Xal: ....
Me: ....

When he finally looked up the barrage of questions was unexpected and a little frightening.

Xal: Why are you leaving your current job?
Me: Oh, I'm not getting enough hours-
Xal: -Do you get paid under the table?
Me: Uh, yes. But I get tips-
Xal: So a union is a step up huh? *Laughs*
Me: *Encouraged by laughter* Oh yeah, I'm really-
Xal: What kinds of fish do you know? Just list them.
Me: Um... Talipa, salmon, catfish-
Xal: -Actually, just seafood in general.
Me: Okay.. Salmon, halibut, crab, lobster--
Xal: -You like lobster?
Me: oh yeah, it's great--
Xal: -Keep going.
Me: Uh...Halibut-..I said that already... Um, Arctic char, clams, scallops, oysters, mussels--
Xal: -That's enough.
Me: *Meekly* Okay...

The entire time I talked with Xal, I had the feeling he was either in a hurry to get somewhere else or impatient with my answers. Everything would be inturrupted, and when it wasn't, he would be silent for a long time after I answered and scribble something down on his copy of my resume. I don't know if this has ever happened to you, but honestly? It's one of the most nerve-wracking things I've ever been through. And it shouldn't be, because what was the worst thing he could have said? "No, you don't get the job, sorry." That's it. But with every question I became more nervous.

Finally he said I could go, and that it was a pleasure meeting me. I left, eyes wide and wondering what had just happened to my brain.

However I wasn't home five minutes before the store's number popped up on my caller ID and I was being told to report back in three days for my orientation and to get my uniform, he had liked me and i was hired.

My mind was blown. And for the first six months I was pumped. He seemed like the best boss ever and I was good at the job. It was easy, and i have some sort of work ethic in me (Strange right?). I was seafood's new golden girl in a department that fired the other two guys hired with me before the three month probation period, one for being a no call no show for his shift, and the other for just being crap.

And this is when i began to hear things from my new coworkers. Dave told me that no one stayed long because Xal fired them for no reason. Colleen mentioned a guy who sat down while working and was informed he had been terminated. Terminated? Did this guy think he was Arnold?

Over a year into the job I began to realise Xal was not the awesome boss I had taken him for.

Xal: Tamaracanyougetthefrozenformeineedittogooutprontothanks

....That's Xal, talking as he rushes from one thing to another while talking to you, seeming to assume you understand him as his voice fades in and out.

Then there's his annoying habit of 'losing' notes I put on the bulletin board for days I need off. I'll re-write them over and over, and they're always gone by the next shift. Before I would think that the note disappearing meant he had gotten it and hence I did not need to work. Nay, fine people. I would still be booked. I eventually decided that I had to give them to the ASM (Assistant store manager), and the bookings on days I needed off stopped. Kinda.

Then the work I was doing apparently took a drastic slide, because people would tell me he had been complaining about things I apparently had not done properly. None of these things were ever said to my face, merely bitched about behind my back. I worked harder, but the bitching continued.

Then things began to get into the relm of harassment.

I am a huge flirt. Guys and girls a like are darlings, radiant sunshine flowers and the object of my unending desire. One day, Xal flat-out asked me if I wanted to do dirty things with a girl in bakery.

I was offended and appalled, but I laughed to save face because that is Xal. He asks these things.

Not long after that I got my first write up, where I burst into tears because I thought i had done a particularly good job that night working, and was confused.

Two days after, someone in the department next to me informed me that Xal, often and without provocation, would tell whoever was working at the time that I was going to get pregnant because I was having unprotected sex. In fact, every time I called in sick he attributed it to morning sickness.

I was shocked. How could Xal, lovable and always with a smile, say something so horrible about me? A better question, why?

But i said nothing to the store, partly because I had problems believing it but mostly because the HMR person who told me was not a great source.

Of course, when someone who was a good source came up to me a few months ago and told me that Xal had been spreading a rumor that The Boyfriend and I were having sex in the store bathroom.

The bastard was telling them all about it. This I did go to the union about, because honestly, who wouldn't?

Of course the union did fuck all. They said I had to prove I hadn't had sex with The Boyfriend, and i had to write a statement saying I hadn't. This amazes me and strikes me as bullshit. I have to prove it? And how the hell am I supposed to do that? You've got the damn security cameras!

In summary, Xal is evil but I still work for him cause I need money, I hate where I work and he's trying to get me fired. Gotta love retail.

Little bastard...

See that adorable ball of fur up there? He broke my headphones today.

That's my neighbours' dog Zach. Her son has a lot of courage to try and walk the monster, considering he's like...half the kid's size and way to hyperactive for words.

Anyway. Zach kind of loves me, and whenever he sees me on his morning walk the reaction he has is a lot of jumping and attempted licking. When he saw me this morning the only difference was this time, his paw caught on part of my headphones and ripped them right out of my ears.

The two little rubber buds attached to the headphones popped off them and fell into the grass. I found one of them, but the other one was a lost cause. I wanted to get to the bus on time so I started on my way.

But when I pressed the play button, my right earbud wasn't working.

It ticks me off a lot. They're not particularly good headphones, nor are they expensive, but they're the only ones I have and my music needs to be blaring over the bus noises. It's not even worth asking the neighbour in question to pay for them, though I think she should be the one walking the dog, so it doesn't jump all over people.

Oh! Because I have much nerd love, I have to post this. I've been humming it for pretty much days... And I just have to.

*Mutters* But there's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake. And the Science gets done, and you make a neat gun. For the people who are still alive.

Still alive...

Still alive...

Thanksgiving!

Ha! Thanksgiving is always an ordeal for me, mostly because of what goes on.

Every year my entire family bundles into the car and heads to my grandma Mac Donald’s house, which is my dad’s side of the family, and all the characters from that side gather together to play out our own twisted version of a family reunion.

There’s always far too much food and far too many beers going around for anything even remotely normal. One year my parents start talking about embarrassing stories of my childhood, next year it’s my brothers’ turn and the next year they’re discussing my dads’ teenage antics. It seems to cycle, though once and awhile they mix it up with tales of how pathetic my uncle mike is.

This year is particularly nerve-wracking because I’m bringing The Boyfriend with me, and I can’t remember if last thanksgiving was my uncle mike or my brother. All I know for sure is last year was not embarrassing stories of me. I’m very, very nervous.

But also, excited. Because The Boyfriend can protect me from my cousin Jess, who is twenty-six and hits on me. He started out cool, and then became more and more creepy as his lack of friends began to affect him mentally. Hopefully, boyfriend being around will protect me from “Am I your favorite cousinnnn?” and “Look at this (Random Japanese) game (with horrible translations)!!” He honestly creeps me out so much it’s not even funny…

And then there’s cousin Nick, who is socially retarded. I can remember him dealing with many situations where he didn’t get what he wanted by throwing himself on the ground and screaming, and he’s almost thirteen. Or is thirteen, at this point…I don’t remember. Or I don’t care. It’s hard to decide.

He’s been pretty much raised by my grandparents and aunt Michelle, who’s…. different. I guess when you don’t have any friends outside of your family until elementary school; some social wiring gets all mixed up.

Well, We’ll see how this goes…

****Later*****

Jess isn’t here. I am so much more thankful (Haha, holiday puns) then anyone could imagine.

My family is great and warm and whatnot, though Peggy ticks me off. She’s some sort of cousin or aunt or great aunt or something (All I know for sure is she’s jess’s mom. *nod*). Anyway, every year since I discovered the internet was a good way to avoid awkward conversations, Peggy has marched into the room and asked me to look up whatever wedding pictures she happens to want to show everyone.

And every year since I’ve had a laptop, she’s asked me to use my computer to show her pictures.

This makes me so mad. It’s my laptop. There’s a perfectly good home computer she can use, but no. I get to sit, stewing in my own rage, for up to half an hour while The Boyfriend gets to play games on the home computer. I don’t try to disguise my rage, either. I’m perfectly comfortable glaring at the two people left as they try to figure out who belongs to which baby.

The great and terrible K was the only thing keeping me from saying “So whose getting married next year that no one cares about?”

Dinner was great, as it is every year. I love turkey skin…Nom nom.

Pretty uneventful otherwise. Cept my dad showed my uncle and The Boyfriend ‘Treevenge’…

DON’T LOOK IT UP.

DON’T.

DELEATED

DELEATED