Ha! Thanksgiving is always an ordeal for me, mostly because of what goes on.
Every year my entire family bundles into the car and heads to my grandma Mac Donald’s house, which is my dad’s side of the family, and all the characters from that side gather together to play out our own twisted version of a family reunion.
There’s always far too much food and far too many beers going around for anything even remotely normal. One year my parents start talking about embarrassing stories of my childhood, next year it’s my brothers’ turn and the next year they’re discussing my dads’ teenage antics. It seems to cycle, though once and awhile they mix it up with tales of how pathetic my uncle mike is.
This year is particularly nerve-wracking because I’m bringing The Boyfriend with me, and I can’t remember if last thanksgiving was my uncle mike or my brother. All I know for sure is last year was not embarrassing stories of me. I’m very, very nervous.
But also, excited. Because The Boyfriend can protect me from my cousin Jess, who is twenty-six and hits on me. He started out cool, and then became more and more creepy as his lack of friends began to affect him mentally. Hopefully, boyfriend being around will protect me from “Am I your favorite cousinnnn?” and “Look at this (Random Japanese) game (with horrible translations)!!” He honestly creeps me out so much it’s not even funny…
And then there’s cousin Nick, who is socially retarded. I can remember him dealing with many situations where he didn’t get what he wanted by throwing himself on the ground and screaming, and he’s almost thirteen. Or is thirteen, at this point…I don’t remember. Or I don’t care. It’s hard to decide.
He’s been pretty much raised by my grandparents and aunt Michelle, who’s…. different. I guess when you don’t have any friends outside of your family until elementary school; some social wiring gets all mixed up.
Well, We’ll see how this goes…
My family is great and warm and whatnot, though Peggy ticks me off. She’s some sort of cousin or aunt or great aunt or something (All I know for sure is she’s jess’s mom. *nod*). Anyway, every year since I discovered the internet was a good way to avoid awkward conversations, Peggy has marched into the room and asked me to look up whatever wedding pictures she happens to want to show everyone.
And every year since I’ve had a laptop, she’s asked me to use my computer to show her pictures.
This makes me so mad. It’s my laptop. There’s a perfectly good home computer she can use, but no. I get to sit, stewing in my own rage, for up to half an hour while The Boyfriend gets to play games on the home computer. I don’t try to disguise my rage, either. I’m perfectly comfortable glaring at the two people left as they try to figure out who belongs to which baby.
The great and terrible K was the only thing keeping me from saying “So whose getting married next year that no one cares about?”
Dinner was great, as it is every year. I love turkey skin…Nom nom.
Pretty uneventful otherwise. Cept my dad showed my uncle and The Boyfriend ‘Treevenge’…
DON’T LOOK IT UP.
DON’T.
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